How to Make a Decision and Manifest Anything You Want by Telling Your Story Backwards

I told myself I would never move far away and leave my family for a guy again, but there I was walking to work, considering it. And I was torn about what to do.

We dated for two months before he moved for a double fellowship at the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF). It was supposed to be a casual fling, a slow return to dating after the breakdown of my eleven-year marriage.

Knowing there was an end date made it all the easier to be carefree. It was the happiest I had been in a long time.

He left in September, and I visited in October then again in December. By December, he said, "why don't you move out here." My immediate response of 'no' slowly changed as I realized the only time I was happy was when I was with him.

But still, I hesitated. It was a big move for someone I really only dated for all of two and half months (in person).

So, I thought about it constantly, but it was more like worrying – not very productive thinking – until I heard about this exercise.

If you need help making a decision, tell your life story backwards, from like 94-year-old you sitting in a rocking chair to this exact moment.

Every day, on my mile-and-a-half walk to work, I would tell my story backwards, from 94-year-old me sitting in her rocking chair to 36-year-old me walking the snowy sidewalks of Brookline.

I would play out all the scenarios, all my worries and all the fun. What if I lost my job and I failed? I could just turn around and drive home. What if we got in a fight and broke up? So, my path would diverge, and I would live in the world's coolest city on a different adventure.

It was like Ground Hog Day. Walk to work. Tell my story backwards. Walk to work. Tell my story backwards, over and over, for weeks, until I could reach a decision. I kept going, retelling in new and creative ways, trying to get past this one roadblock I didn't quite understand.

Also, in each story, I made friends; I traveled and saw the sites; I ran races, and I was happy.

And in my heart, I hoped SF would be the place I healed. After all, there was a metal sculpture that literally spelled out the word "HEAL" outside the window of my boyfriend's apartment.

I saw this sign in my mind every day and repeated what I said to myself once when I visited. Looking down at HEAL, I said, "I hope."

Then one day, on my walk, I told my story further back than the present, all the way back to England. And I reminded myself I survived England, where I felt alone and was once so poor when I broke my arm and couldn't collect unemployment that I was picking up coins off the street to feed my electricity box. England, where we couldn't afford rent anymore and had to do live-in jobs for housing. England, where I had no friends.

All of a sudden, the challenge of San Francisco was nothing, and my story was, "of course, you're going to move to San Francisco, and you're going to be fine. You survived England. You take on challenges. That's what you do."

After identifying the roadblock - the fear of reliving old hardships - I told myself stories of job security, friendships, and fun. I intentionally planned how I would not put myself in the same situation and promised to do those things that were specifically in place to make me happy.

In August, I accepted a position at UCSF and drove from Boston to San Francisco by myself, camping, hiking, and horseback riding along the way. And so, my adventure began.

Little did I know that I would manifest the start of my healing journey and an amazing experience in a new city with my new love. I had no idea I was doing this. I thought this was just an exercise to help me make a decision.

I moved to San Francisco, and all my 'stories' came true, and I wasn't super specific about them. I just imagined how it all would make me feel. It was like I gave my brain instructions and a homework assignment and said, "ok, make it happen."

My job was great, and I made so many friends with young people like me in my department. I started a running group with some of them.

I got into long-distance running again and trained on SF hills. I ran a half marathon race and came in third place. Then, I ran a 5k race on the Embarcadero and came in first place with a 6:09 minute mile split pace, my personal record! Insanity!

My boyfriend and I had an amazing time sightseeing, skiing in Lake Tahoe, traveling the coast, and exploring the city. It all worked out.

I cannot recommend the "telling your story backwards" exercise enough to people, not only for making a decision but for navigating anything and manifesting the life you want. Because in every scenario, you plan the best outcome. You always plan a happy ending.

All you have to do is imagine it. Be creative. Be grand. Tell many versions. Overcome the roadblock, and then let it go. Don't think about it anymore because you already gave your brain its assignment. It will work on it in the background, while you sleep, while you do other things. It will succeed in delivering your story, so make it a good one.